I've been playing for half as long as some of the other flutes in my band. Sometimes I feel like that doesn't matter but other times, my self-confidence hits rock bottom. I think I'm good but I don't know where that really is. There's a girl in the band who is an amazing flute player. I'm older than her but we've been playing about the same amount of time. I want to go into Music Education and have flute as my primary instrument. I'm really worried because I haven't been playing very long and I haven't worked with music for very long. Everytime I hear this girl play or hear other people play, I feel inferior and like I don't belong in the class that's supposed to be for advanced players. I know I have a good sound but technique is questionable. How far can I get with just a good sound?(rethorical question =])
Basically, I'm asking how to keep my confidence up around these people who I feel like are better than me and how to not beat myself over the head everytime I screw up a rhythm and how to not let my self-esteem slip because of it. Yeah, I know, I might take this too seriously but I'm a perfectionist and I love to be the best(without sounding conceited) and when I'm not the best, I feel inferior. Any advice?

you will always hear other young flute players that are good, so don't let that discourage you, wait till you get to college..then you realize there are many more that are good, let them inspire you, not discourage you..

keep working hard and dont worry about age too much. several years ago I had a student that picked up the flute at age 14 and wound up getting a full scholarship to NY University for music ed.

first ad formost-Don't get caught up on whoes better then you, heck if i did that with my flute i'd be so rock bottom and thats just when in science or history classes (that i have with the 4 most amazing flute players in the school)
secondly, get your self a private teacher- my teacher has taught me so much in one year of lessons- with a teacher you are ble to build on what you need to.
and lastly, if you are not comfitable playing in that band or ochestra or what ever it is, take a short break from it (a week or 2) t build on your scales bit, take the peiecs home and work on them in the ime you would ussually be there, if you are not able to take a short break just ignore the girl who you think is better and think about what you are good at.

hope this helps your confidence a bit

hearing someone who is great - and the same age as you should spur you on, not grind you down! Think to yourself that if she can do it, so can you. And hit the scales and practise those pieces until you can play them in your sleep. Getting better technically is something that you don't notice right away, it just dawn on you after a few weeks that the piece you used to dread is now skipping about under your fingers and you didn't even get nervous before you played it.

My dear friend: You may have total confidence in the fact that nobody can play exactly the same way as you. Let your love of music be the reason to express yourself, not the desire to compete or to be perfect. In music, perfection is not the goal- after all, drum machines keep perfect time, but an imperfect human drummer sounds so much better.

It does seem that the world is full of musical technical wizards, some of them astonishingly young. But that does not mean that they will keep up their interest, have great careers, and crowd you out of a chance for success. Many young virtuosos burn out early because they lose the joy they had when they first started.

You say you have a good sound. That's great, because without that as your foundation, everything else hardly matters. I once heard a flutist who could play complicated pieces at warp speed, but her tone was awful, nearly painful to my ears. What a waste!

If you play because you love music, it doesn't even matter what the future brings, because it will be something you can take pleasure in for the rest of your life. Never play to show off or impress anybody- play because it is what moves you, and enriches your life. Do this, and people will be attracted to your enthusiastic inspiration, and not care that others can do things that you cannot.

Of all of the people who were in band in high school my senior year, I was one of only 4 or 5 that actually studied music in college.

And the only one who did anything with it afterwards. This coming from a 2nd chair flute player.

See, tenacity and staying the course is 90% of the goal. That girl that you wish you could play like, well, there's a god chance that she'll never actually do anything with it in her career or adult life, so in the end, you will be better than her(and better as in a decade or so you'll be able to far exceed where she left off)

I a way, you have to be a bit mercenary and a bit of a jerk about this. the only person that you are really interested in competing against is yourself. And, it's also liberating to not have to deal with what people think about you any more. And, people who act like this without being jerks of course, end up usually being quite well respected.

Actually, she does want go into music. Her older brother is an amazing saxophone player so it only figures that she's following in his footsteps, willingly I think.