I have a joke...
A man was on a plane complaining to the flight attendant.
"Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I never get to see the movie, and I don`t get any window blinds"
She replied, "Shut up, Captain, and land the plane"

I forgot to tell u..u must on the speaker to listen to the joke. On the Speaker! http://pages.sbcglobal.net/mmtimmy/b.html

really funny

I`ve got another one.
Russia has the biggest pool of Musicians...
If u see a Russian walking out from an airport, holding a violin, he must be a violinist.
If u him walking out with a flute, he must be a flutist.
If u see him with a cymbal, he must be a percusisonist.
If u see him with NOTHING...well then, he must be a...pianist. ( too heavy to carry ) HA!

So... let`s get soem blonde jokes going here. Either that or jokes about the french...

Q How many soldiers does it take to defend Paris??
A Nobody knows, it`s never been done.


So these three girls are about to be executed. First the brunette goes. The colonel counts down... three, two, one. Suddenly the brunette screams "TORNADO!" And all the soldiers run off... she flees to the forest.
Next, the redhead is escorted to the platfom. SHe heard what the brunette did, so when the colonel said one... "EARTHQUAKE!" and all the soldiers ran off again, looking for shelter.
Next the blonde, thinking she was mighty clever, was escorted up to the platform. And she too, at the countdown yelled. the colonel said three, two, one, and she yelled "FIRE!"

I know, it`s corny. But I had to get it out there.

I`ve heard that joke before except it was with an Englishman an American and an Irishman!!!

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building at the same time. Who hits the ground first?

The brunette. The blonde had to stop and ask for directions.

Pianoman5

Three blondes walk in to a bar, order a table for 7 and three champagne bottles. They`re obviously celebrating and are VERY proud of themselves. A few minutes later four more blondes come in. They all get exited and give each other hugs. One of the blondes then places a picture on the middle of the table. hey all look at it for a minute, laugh and yell "51 days!"
A few minutes later the bartender, who had become very curious by now, walked over to the table to clean it, andto see what the picture was. WHen he got closer, he saw it wasn`t a picture, it was a small puzzle, of Elmo! Now he didn`t know what to think, so he asked: "What are you celebrating?"
The leader of the blondes looked at him prousdly and said: "We bought this puzzle, and even though the box said 5-8 years, we did it in 51 days!!"


Nathan

Here`s a link to the joke I was talking about. Really messed up, but really funny:http://www.xdr.com/phil/jokes/19990115_11_24_10__.txt